Birth Story

It was MLK Day (Monday), a day usually spent in service, but I felt like being lazy. I stayed in my bed for hours that morning, except for potty breaks. I knew I would be welcoming my baby in the coming days, and I just wanted to relax as much as possible. When I finally got out of bed, I decided to Netflix and chill on the couch. I took a nap and then woke up suddenly when I felt something wet on my thighs. Did I just pee in my sleep? As I walked to the bathroom, I felt a trickle down my leg. Liquid slowly streamed out as I sat on the toilet,  but I realized it wasn't urine because I couldn't stop the flow. In disbelief, I said out loud, "My water just broke". I didn't panic. It was around 4:40pm. I showered, ate dinner, did laundry, and straightened up around my house because I knew the baby was arriving soon. I called my OB, doula, and my friend/birth partner to let them know what was happening. My OB was concerned that my membranes ruptured with no contractions/surges. Based on my cervical check a few days before, my cervix was still long and had not started opening and thinning and she worried about the long journey for my body to begin labor. She told me to head to the hospital so they could confirm what was happening. I called my mom and told her I was bringing Isis over while I went to the hospital. Our bags were already packed in the car. As I drove to my mom's house, I was amazed to see snow flurries dancing in the streetlights. It was almost 10pm.

When I arrived at Labor and Delivery, the resident confirmed that indeed my membranes had ruptured and my cervix was barely open a centimeter. My baby was still very active and doing well, but his head was not engaged in my pelvis. My doctor recommended Cervidil to thin and open my cervix. After 12 hours of surges, there still wasn't much change. Next, they inserted a Clark bulb for induction. I chose to use nitrous gas to manage the discomfort while they inserted the bulb, and it made me feel tipsy. The bulb fell out in the toilet after several hours. I loudly screamed, "It's in the toilet", and everyone came running to the bathroom. They thought I was talking about the baby. At that point, my cervix was open about 4 centimeters. I had several more hours of surges with no progress. I walked, squatted, inverted, pumped, and tried various methods to try to help my body and my baby get in position. As intense as they were, my surges were not strong enough or frequent enough to deliver my baby. It had been a day and a half since my water broke. Eventually, my doctor said it was time for me to consider Pitocin, the drug that I had avoided as long as possible. Pitocin (a hormone) is effective at strengthening contractions, but it causes significantly more pain than would happen naturally. After I agreed, she told me about pain management options, including nitrous, IV fentanyl, and epidural. With the  intensity that I felt with my "not strong enough" surges, I just couldn't do even stronger ones for hours. I decided to get an epidural so I could sleep while my body was working. I had the option of starting the epidural before pitocin or waiting to see how it felt before an epidural, and I chose to do it before. I fell asleep with a peanut ball between my legs to keep my pelvis open for the baby to move down, which was very uncomfortable. I woke up around 2 something to try to change sides and get more comfortable. The nurse came in to check on me and said to let her know if I started feeling pressure like I needed to poop. I told her I already felt that way. She checked my cervix and was shocked to see that I had fully dilated to 10 cm and she could feel the hair on my baby's head. Before I started the pitocin drip, my doctor had said that she didn't think I would be fully dilated when she came back the next morning, but my body defied the odds again. The nurse called my doctor and everyone assembled for the final phase of my delivery. It was showtime! I turned on my Joy playlist- the same one that I created over a year ago to help me self-administer the IVF shots. I wanted to allow my body to guide the process without a lot of direction from the people in the room. I closed my eyes and breathed, changing positions as needed. At 3:44am on Wednesday, my baby boy left the comfort of my womb and entered into the world. I cried as he was laid on my chest and I cut the umbilical cord. I did it!

I always wanted a natural birthing experience, and my reality was more medical than I desired. My story took unexpected turns. However, the ending was perfect. I am grateful for My Joy.

Created with love: 12/31/23
Frozen in time: 1/5/24
Transferred with hope: 5/7/24
Special Delivery: 1/22/25